Forming healthy relationships is an essential part of living a well-rounded, fulfilled life. This affectionate bond created between two people, whether it’s with a close friend, parent, children or a coworker, is characterised by strong emotions such as trust and affection.
Landmark Forum, a 3-day personal development course, teaches that relating—and the quality of our relationships—is of deep, natural, and inherent concern for all of us and like any human endeavor, takes attention, care, and commitment.
To help create lasting relationships that work, Landmark Forum reviews some of the tools people need to produce breakthrough results in their lives.
Listen better
David Cunningham, one of the program leaders of Landmark Forum, shares this advice: “If we literally listen to people and relate to just what they say, it keeps a lot of the argument and a lot of the upset out of the conversation.” Be really interested in how they see life and listen to them until they voice their opinion. Then, they’ll want to listen to us.”
Be connected
You don’t necessarily have to agree with someone else’s view, but you can still be interested and connected in what they are saying. This not only allows the person an outlet to get their point across, but it also gives you the opportunity to find out exactly why that view is important to them.
Take an interest
Rather than trying to impress someone or get them to think highly of you, be the first person in the relationship to take an interest in the other party.
For example, if your mom enjoys knitting – even if you don’t – ask her questions about the hobby. Take an interest in her first and she’ll likely turn around and ask you about your interests and hobbies. Relationships are all about the give and take, so why not be the initiator?
Appreciate people
Spend some time looking at the good in your relationship and then let your partner or friend know about it. Davind Cunningham of Landmark Forum reviews this concept, saying: “The fastest way to get connected to someone is to acknowledge them for something and appreciate them. If you can just pause for a minute and think, ‘you know what, there is always something you can appreciate them for. It’s amazing how fast that dissolves any distance or past disputes.”
Validate others
If your partner is upset and you can’t understand why, realize their concern may not necessarily be your concern. However, by validating their perspective you’ll show them that you understand and accept their thoughts and feelings. In today’s world people are always debating over who is right and who is wrong. Instead of winning an argument, make the priority be about connection, love and honor; it will go along way toward defusing conflict.
Maintaining a healthy relationship definitely takes work. Talk to your partner about things that you could improve on and then take the necessary steps to solve the problem. Above all, be respectful and keep the lines of communication open.
