A few decades ago, most of us met our romantic partners at school, church, or in the neighborhood. A hundred years ago, most people were introduced to their future spouse by parents or other relatives. Today, we use dating sites not just to find a spouse, but for any romantic connection. They’re even used to find friends.
This change has broadened our relationship options in beautiful ways, but it also makes it easier for bad actors or even criminals to abuse or scam us. Dating background checks are the right way to stay safe in the era of the Internet.
Look for a criminal record
If you’re considering stepping up intimacy with a person, the most important thing to look into is a possible criminal record. It’s just as common for an American adult to have a criminal record as it is to have a college degree.
It’s important to note that not all criminal records are the same. For starters, an arrest is not the same thing as a conviction. Not all public records differentiate between these two, so check carefully to make sure the person you want to date wasn’t actually charged with something.
Even if you happen to find a charge, you still need to check to find whether the person was actually convicted. If they were, take a moment to see what the charge was. If it was, for example, a minor drug charge from an ill-advised prom night a decade ago, it might not actually be worth worrying about.
Social media can tell you a lot about a person’s hobbies, interests, friends, and family. While no one is responsible for every idiotic comment someone else might post on their wall, there is some truth to the old adage that you are the people you hang out with.
If you see consistently troubling remarks from your potential date’s closest friends or family, this could be a warning sign. You can also learn more about them by understanding their interests and hobbies. For instance, if they continuously post about the advanced surfing lessons they’re taking, you can expect the topic to come up during your date.
Remember to take negative comments with a grain of salt, though. If your potential match is a teacher with some bad reviews from students, remember that students who fail might just be trying to exact some petty revenge. Try to get a sense of the person through a holistic view of lots of data, not just one or two comments.
Look for their name on the sex offender registry
The Internet is a boon to genuine sex offenders. They have to register with the police in the area where they live, and when neighbors are keeping watch, this is a good incentive to be on their best behavior. In most cases, though, no one is watching the Internet.
Getting online gives an unreformed sex offender with crime on their mind a way to reach people outside the neighborhood. There is a national sex offender registry, and every state has one, too. This is all public information. Again, the only caveat is to look for why, and possibly when, the person got put on the registry at all.
How to get the best information
It is possible to do a dating background check yourself, but your best bet is to use a background check website that can aggregate all the information from public records all over the country. This is the fastest and most efficient way to get the information you need.
Using one of these services assures you that you haven’t missed any important information. It will also help you differentiate between records of people with similar names. Most importantly, it will give you peace of mind that you’re pursuing a relationship with a great person.
