Unfortunately, domestic abuse can happen to anyone at any time regardless of social status or finances. In many cases, the abuser has such a psychological hold on the abused person that they willingly remain with them despite the pain that they inflict.
It can be confusing for friends and family members to understand why someone they love may remain in an abusive relationship. The abused loved one may defend their abuser, cover up the abuse, and even help them get out of jail if they’re incarcerated. The psychological reasons for defending the abuser are profoundly complicated and usually spring from shame.
Rather than getting angry with your friend or family member, you should support them the best that you can. If you suspect that someone you love may be a victim of domestic abuse, here are some of the biggest signs that point to yes, and what to do about it.
Physical Marks
Although you should not assume a person is being abused anytime you see a bruise; sometimes it can be an indication of someone inflicting harm on them. Try to take notice of injuries which point to signs of being punched or pushed, particularly on the arms.
A telltale sign of the physical marks being a result of abuse is the victim trying to hide it. Perhaps they wear sunglasses inside to cover up a black eye or wear long sleeves in extremely hot weather. Likely, they may have a poor explanation for what happened.
Change In Behavior
Someone who is usually quite talkative and upbeat who has suddenly turned withdrawn may be a victim of abuse. This change in behavior should be seen as a red flag for something which could be going on at home.
They may start to cancel on plans, or fail to show up at appointments or even work. Abusers often force their victims to cut off contact with the outside world. Therefore, sudden antisocial behavior may be a sign.
Fearful Around Abuser
If you notice someone you love seem afraid or anxious when they’re near their suspected abuser, then you should keep an eye on the situation. Perhaps the children seem unusually quiet, or overly-coached into certain behaviors.
Despite seeming afraid around their abuser, they find excuses for why they might be angry. They may be so afraid that they refuse to take any risks which may result in further abuse. Therefore, they keep their mouths shut for self-protection.
Low Self-Esteem
Over time, domestic abuse will start to affect a person’s self-worth. They may start to lose all hope that they can take control of the situation. As a result, they don’t think very highly of themselves.
If you suspect that someone you love is a victim, the best thing that you can do is to offer support. Let them know that you’re there to support them if they ever want to get out of their situation.